good jokes !

mr2000jp · May 2nd, 2001

sandie , you gave me an idea

what is your favourate joke (every one )?
place a good joke in here .

Sandie · May 2nd, 2001

He he hope I didn't start anything annoying

I'm not sure that my favorite joke would go over well in here. Most people I have told it to think it's funny BUT some may not. SO if anyone wants to hear it just PM me and I'll tell you. In the mean time lets see if I can think of one more appropriate for the boards..... hmm ok here's one.....

As a mother was working in the kitchen she was listening to her son playing
with his new electric train in the living room. She heard the train stop and
her son say, "All of you sons of *****es who want off, get the hell off now,
cause this is the last stop! And all of you sons of *****es who are getting
on, get your asses in the train, cause we're going down the tracks."

The horrified mother went in and told her son, "We don't use that kind of
language in this house! Now I want you to go to your room and you will stay
there for TWO HOURS. When you come out, you may play with your train, but I
want you to use nice language."

Two hours later, the son came out of the bedroom and resumed playing with
his train. Soon the train stopped and the mother heard her son say, "All
passengers who are disembarking the train, please remember to take all of
your belongings with you. We thank you for riding with us today and hope
your trip was a pleasant one. We hope you will ride with us again soon."
She hears the little boy continue, "For those of you just boarding, we ask
you to stow all of your hand luggage under your seat. Remember, there is no
smoking on the train. We hope you will have a pleasant and relaxing journey
with us today."

As the mother began to smile, the child added, "For those of you who are
pissed off about the TWO HOUR delay, please see the ***** in the kitchen."

Hope I didn't offend anyone

campaign2016 · May 2nd, 2001

Three mice were sitting at a bar doing shots of whiskey and talking about how tough they were.
The first mouse takes a shot and says "I'm so tough I steal the cheese off mouse traps and then bench press the bar twenty times" He then downs another shot.

The next mouse takes a shot and says "Thats nothin' I sniff rat poison for fun" and then he takes another shot

The third mouse just sits quietly and after two shots he stands up to leave. The first two mice start laughing at him and calling him weakling and the like. The third mouse gets to the door turns around and says "I'm going home to screw the cat"

**Betamax** · May 2nd, 2001

OI! Im Irish and don't forget it!!!

Only we are allowed to slag ourselves off!

There are 3 men Pady the irishman, Billy the Scotsman and George the Englishman. They are standing on top of a magic cliff. By jumping from this cliff and crying out there hearts desire they shall land in it. George goes first. He jumps and yells Money and lands in a sea of money. He gathers as much as he can and leaves.

Now Billy jumps, yells women and lands in a sea of beautiful women. He gathers as much as he can then leaves.

Now its pady's turn. he starts to run to the cliff but trips and falls over yelling...

" Holy ****TTTTTTTTTTTTTT!"

**Betamax** · May 2nd, 2001

Knock! Knock!

campaign2016 · May 2nd, 2001

Quote:

Originally posted by Betamax
Knock! Knock!

Who's there?

**Betamax** · May 2nd, 2001

Quote:

Originally posted by campaign2016

Who's there?

Doctor

Musashi · May 4th, 2001

Quote:

Originally posted by Betamax

Doctor

The Doctor ???

**LanGaidin** · May 4th, 2001

ROFLMAO That's gotta be the funniest knock knock joke I've ever seen, just because I've never actually seen someone jump in a ruin one like that, before.

What's so funny is that I'm not sure if Musashi really didn't catch what was going on, or if he did that deliberately.

campaign2016 · May 4th, 2001

Ooppss
My Bad

Ummmm.....

Doctor Who?

**Betamax** · May 4th, 2001

Quote:

Originally posted by campaign2016
Ooppss
My Bad

Ummmm.....

Doctor Who?

%$£%^&* how'd you guess!

Musashi · May 5th, 2001

Quote:

Originally posted by Disturbed
I think Musashi understood the joke...

Me... I don't understand anything...

campaign2016 · May 5th, 2001

Quote:

Originally posted by Musashi

Me... I don't understand anything...

I just fake it most of the time too

**Ryos** · May 5th, 2001

My favorite joke can't be posted here because it would corrupt the youth of America. Then the conservative religious would come to my house and burn it down. Oh...

campaign2016 · May 5th, 2001

damn those youth of America

**Betamax** · May 5th, 2001

They could be any worse than the little Sh1ts that are here in Belfast. They bomb schools!:eek:

campaign2016 · May 5th, 2001

our kids dont bomb schools

they just go on rampages with hunting riffles and machine guns:mg: :laser: :rockets:

Xenomorph · May 8th, 2001

Joke... a good one...

A man went to store and he had an axe.

**SimonMallion** · May 8th, 2001

Ok, crap joke: A man walks into a bar, and says: 'Ouch!'.

Ok, another crap one: What do you call a woman with a pint of beer on her head? Beatrix.

Ok, last one: What do you call a woman with a pint on her head, playing snooker? Beatrix Potter.

campaign2016 · May 8th, 2001

this was supposed to be for good jokes like this one

The blind man picked up the hammer and saw

May 2nd, 2001	#1 (permalink)
mr2000jp Registered User Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: jordan Posts: 171	good jokes ! sandie , you gave me an idea what is your favourate joke (every one )? place a good joke in here . __________________ every one on this world deserves happines. but not when it will be taken from others.

May 2nd, 2001	#3 (permalink)
campaign2016 Registered User Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Blue Island Posts: 345	Three mice were sitting at a bar doing shots of whiskey and talking about how tough they were. The first mouse takes a shot and says "I'm so tough I steal the cheese off mouse traps and then bench press the bar twenty times" He then downs another shot. The next mouse takes a shot and says "Thats nothin' I sniff rat poison for fun" and then he takes another shot The third mouse just sits quietly and after two shots he stands up to leave. The first two mice start laughing at him and calling him weakling and the like. The third mouse gets to the door turns around and says "I'm going home to screw the cat" __________________ "You seem a decent fellow. I'd hate to kill you"

May 2nd, 2001	#4 (permalink)
Betamax Resident Movie Critic Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland Posts: 9,480	OI! Im Irish and don't forget it!!! Only we are allowed to slag ourselves off! There are 3 men Pady the irishman, Billy the Scotsman and George the Englishman. They are standing on top of a magic cliff. By jumping from this cliff and crying out there hearts desire they shall land in it. George goes first. He jumps and yells Money and lands in a sea of money. He gathers as much as he can and leaves. Now Billy jumps, yells women and lands in a sea of beautiful women. He gathers as much as he can then leaves. Now its pady's turn. he starts to run to the cliff but trips and falls over yelling... " Holy ****TTTTTTTTTTTTTT!" __________________ Superior marketing of an inferior product will always win over inferior marketing of a superior product.

May 2nd, 2001	#5 (permalink)
Betamax Resident Movie Critic Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland Posts: 9,480	Knock! Knock! __________________ Superior marketing of an inferior product will always win over inferior marketing of a superior product.

May 4th, 2001	#9 (permalink)
LanGaidin Emulation Freak Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Indiana (US) Posts: 198	ROFLMAO That's gotta be the funniest knock knock joke I've ever seen, just because I've never actually seen someone jump in a ruin one like that, before. What's so funny is that I'm not sure if Musashi really didn't catch what was going on, or if he did that deliberately. __________________ al'Lan Mandragoran Last edited by LanGaidin; May 4th, 2001 at 06:03.

May 2nd, 2001	#2 (permalink)
Sandie Emu Chick Join Date: Apr 2001 Posts: 230	He he hope I didn't start anything annoying I'm not sure that my favorite joke would go over well in here. Most people I have told it to think it's funny BUT some may not. SO if anyone wants to hear it just PM me and I'll tell you. In the mean time lets see if I can think of one more appropriate for the boards..... hmm ok here's one..... As a mother was working in the kitchen she was listening to her son playing with his new electric train in the living room. She heard the train stop and her son say, "All of you sons of ***es who want off, get the hell off now, cause this is the last stop! And all of you sons of *es who are getting on, get your asses in the train, cause we're going down the tracks." The horrified mother went in and told her son, "We don't use that kind of language in this house! Now I want you to go to your room and you will stay there for TWO HOURS. When you come out, you may play with your train, but I want you to use nice language." Two hours later, the son came out of the bedroom and resumed playing with his train. Soon the train stopped and the mother heard her son say, "All passengers who are disembarking the train, please remember to take all of your belongings with you. We thank you for riding with us today and hope your trip was a pleasant one. We hope you will ride with us again soon." She hears the little boy continue, "For those of you just boarding, we ask you to stow all of your hand luggage under your seat. Remember, there is no smoking on the train. We hope you will have a pleasant and relaxing journey with us today." As the mother began to smile, the child added, "For those of you who are pissed off about the TWO HOUR delay, please see the *** in the kitchen." Hope I didn't offend anyone

May 4th, 2001	#10 (permalink)
campaign2016 Registered User Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Blue Island Posts: 345	Ooppss My Bad Ummmm..... Doctor Who? __________________ "You seem a decent fellow. I'd hate to kill you"

May 5th, 2001	#14 (permalink)
Ryos Revenger of Vengeance Join Date: May 2001 Location: Nowhere Posts: 11,239	My favorite joke can't be posted here because it would corrupt the youth of America. Then the conservative religious would come to my house and burn it down. Oh... Last edited by Ryos; May 5th, 2001 at 10:57.

May 5th, 2001	#15 (permalink)
campaign2016 Registered User Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Blue Island Posts: 345	damn those youth of America __________________ "You seem a decent fellow. I'd hate to kill you"

May 5th, 2001	#16 (permalink)
Betamax Resident Movie Critic Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland Posts: 9,480	They could be any worse than the little Sh1ts that are here in Belfast. They bomb schools!:eek: __________________ Superior marketing of an inferior product will always win over inferior marketing of a superior product.

May 5th, 2001	#17 (permalink)
campaign2016 Registered User Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Blue Island Posts: 345	our kids dont bomb schools they just go on rampages with hunting riffles and machine guns:mg: :laser: :rockets: __________________ "You seem a decent fellow. I'd hate to kill you"

May 8th, 2001	#18 (permalink)
Xenomorph Registered User Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Finland Posts: 356	Joke... a good one... A man went to store and he had an axe. __________________ Send something to this guy: NateMan900@aol.com ...perkele! Last edited by Xenomorph; May 8th, 2001 at 10:57.

May 8th, 2001	#19 (permalink)
SimonMallion Emu author Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: England Posts: 1,062	Ok, crap joke: A man walks into a bar, and says: 'Ouch!'. Ok, another crap one: What do you call a woman with a pint of beer on her head? Beatrix. Ok, last one: What do you call a woman with a pint on her head, playing snooker? Beatrix Potter. __________________ http://simonmallion.homedns.org/PSXMemTool

May 8th, 2001	#20 (permalink)
campaign2016 Registered User Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Blue Island Posts: 345	this was supposed to be for good jokes like this one The blind man picked up the hammer and saw __________________ "You seem a decent fellow. I'd hate to kill you"

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