[Metalmurphy]

mis: What about the black device on the right labeled "MOD chip!"

Sony: Aaaieee. Why do we bother to label English if you are too stupid and dumb to read and understand!? It is a prug-in MOD chip.

mis: You mean that "game enhancer" that makes it possible to play illegal home-burned copies of games? I don't get it. Why would you make it possible to pirate your own games?

Sony: You Americans, you all are a stealing thief horde of Mongols! We thinking, if we cannot stop you to put irregal chip in machines, you just pay us for chip and we makea more money, right on. Prus, you need to pray all good games Japanese anyway.

mis: Dare I ask what the "Clapper" device built into the center is used for?

Sony: CRAP ON! *CRAP CRAP* CRAP OFF *CRAP CRAP* CRAP ON CRAP OFF, THE CRAPPER! HA HA!

mis: Of course. I assume in addition to helping old women turn off their televisions in the middle of the night, the Playstation 3 will also play CDs and DVDs like its antiquated predecessor, the Playstation 2?

Sony: DVD isa old news. The Praystation 3 pray any kind of media.

mis: Well besides DVDs and CDs, what other disc based media is there?

Sony: No, risten: ARR media. Not just disc. It pray DVD, it pray VHS, Beta, it pray SyQuest, it pray record, it pray 8 track, it pray EVERYTHING!

mis: So the PS3 is backwards compatible with all the ancient PS1 and classic PS2 titles?

Sony: Is PS1 and PS2 part of ARR MEDIA?

mis: Er... I suppose so.

Sony: Then it pray! How hard to understand is this, stupid fat man?

mis: Let's change gears and talk about the controller for a minute. This thing really looks fully kick ass! I counted 83 buttons on the device total. Considering the average human has only ten digits, doesn't that many inputs make gameplay almost completely impossible?

Sony: The Praystation 3 hava the most advanced controller ever made. Isa more advanced than controls for Concorde airplane! Its use require discipline and many hours of training with a master. You are young and impulsive. You are a weak germ. You are not worthy of the Praystation 3 controller.

(The PS3's multi-media capabilities came through our tests with flying colors. The console not only played an old VHS tape of Perfect Strangers, but also The New Adventures of Mary Kate and Ashley for Gameboy, and a 1972 Clue board game.)